would you believe me if i said ive not done a single tutorial since term started?i think not.but do i need you all to believe me?i guess.cause suffocations at its high point.its all coming down.i cant see the light at the end of the tunnel anymore.i cant seem to hold up the walls tht are closing in.sharing helps.talking abt it helps.gives my oxygen.gives me breath.its all so bad now cause im on the verge of a major nervous breakdown.i can feel it in my blood.haha.stackstackstack.the pile will topple.its the leaning tower of pizza.or however you spell it.doesnt really matter i guess.this is why God didnt give me council.my future seems so bleak.my knees hurt.gym routine.ive no time.common test.ive no time.ballet.ive no time.i shouldnt have skipped ballet.i regret it so bad now.i shldnt have.i shldnt have.how do i tell you i need a break?when all you'll do is turn ard and scold me.im not superman.if you think scolding me when im already feeling like shit abt skipping class.then carry on.it doesnt matter if im dead or alive.how does it?when i feel like a walking corspe.theres nothing to this life anymore.im sick and tired.do i need to be left alone?yes.but do i need attention?yes.so which is it vanessa?make up your mind.maybe youre the reason for everything youre feeling now.so go kill yourself vanessa.it might work.kill yourself and then combust in eternal flames.combustion.seems so unfamiliar.why?cause my brains have turned into mush.yeah.you should hurt forever.cause i say so.vanessa kang pei shi sucks.but maybe its just the time of the month.
vk
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Eunice Ngbelieves with God; everything's alrite.Saturday, May 21, 2005
God doesnt only help those who helps themselves. thats total bull. my God helps everyone,He especially wants His grace and favour to abound in all of us. God helps those who'll rest in Him and trust Him wholeheartedly,like just sits down there, does nothing and waits for God's wonders to manifest. Jesus loves tht kinda child-like faith. eyy dudes,my bowling season's starting tmr,im super super scaredd. its my first major tournament la. and im gonna be representign my sch. which means ive a part to play in attaining championship.thts crazy!
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
Oh,the season started on friday alr and sa bowled damn well. the girls especially. okay,for guys individual,this guy from saints got gold,some other guy from rj silver and eugene from ac bronze. but overall ac's second,trailing behind saints. whalao!!!! sa is strong la. so we watched the saints girls bowling,theyre darn strong tooo. Ehhhhh,im damn scared.i really want ac to win champion.i really really really really really really really really want.howww? i want it sooooooooo bad. ireallywannabowlwell. 700series. arghhhhhhhh. God's supernatural favour God's supernatural favour God's supernatural favour God's spernatural favourrrr. Ohh,tmr's also council voting day.ahahahaha. aiyah,im 80%certain i wont get into council,unless God really wants me there la. anyways,thts not a worry.dnt get in dnt get in la. Sigh,im kinda hoping tht i wont get into council cos its really alot alot alot of committment la.i dnt know if im ready. im greedy,i just wanted to join for all the fun.orientation and all. dang.
Eyy dudes,pray for me alright? for God's will to be done whether its council or not. also for bowling. ahhh.
youre shit.just shit. say you'll be there,hug here hug there.smile here smile there. bluff pple. youre never there. just shut up la. dnt even bother saying anythg.really.no one actually hears. we allknow its plain bullshit. so dont even try.
hhahaha. that was mean. but really. i said what i wanted to.
I LOVE YOU GUYS!!
bbeeebbs
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Beverlybelieves with God; everything's alrite.Sunday, May 15, 2005
you guys have no idea how much you all mean to me.
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Beverlybelieves with God; everything's alrite.Friday, May 13, 2005
van your not making any sense.
i miss all of you all too, everyone does.
its not only you,
but life has to go on,
even though i hate for it to go on.
i cannot find people like you all here.
sigh nvm.
looking back is not an option i guess.
we must look forward.
and let God lead us.
i miss you all.
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Eunice Ngbelieves with God; everything's alrite.Thursday, May 12, 2005
